When I look at my reflection in the mirror and see my groin where once there was a different set of genitals, I don’t feel like what I have now is new. It feels like the restoration of something that was always there, hiding underneath. Like the last 32 years were an anomaly and now things are how they were always supposed to be.

That’s why we call it gender confirmation or affirmation surgery, not “sex reassignment” or whatever BS that cis doctors came up with. I didn’t have anything reassigned. I had them rearranged back to how they should have developed in utero. The way that matched my brain and who I actually was.

Peeing now similarly feels very “right” and natural where it always felt so unnatural and weird the old way. Sure, it’s more convenient for peeing in the woods, but it never felt right and for a long long time I didn’t know why.

Things are finally how they are supposed to be and it’s hard to describe how much of a difference that makes for my brain.