I would never tell another trans person what words they can use for themself but can I rant for a minute about one of my terminology pet peeves?
I fucking hate the term “MtF” (Male to Female transition)! I was never a male and it wasn’t my transition that made me a female. I was assumed to be a boy and later a man based on the shape of my genitals at birth. That’s why we have the term AMAB (Assigned Male at Birth). But that didn’t make me a male. That was one aspect of a broader human personhood that was then generalized to dictate how I should act and label myself.
I have always been a woman. My brain developed that way and no amount of growing up a tomboy would make me a man. My transition has helped bring my body into alignment with my brain and that happens to follow a pathway that outsiders may perceive as changing me from a man to a woman. But they are wrong.
I am a transgender woman. I am AMAB. But I am NOT MtF.
I tried to be an M to F trans woman for awhile. But I still felt I was a woman on the weekends, too, so I just went 24/7. 🙂
What you did, or how you got there, is nobody’s business but your own. Who you are is enough, and should supersede any labeling. I don’t like hearing transgender or transition, as they may apply to me, either, but I don’t expect others to understand well enough to be able to see myself as well as I do. I asked a friend how she would describe me some time ago. She answered, “You’re Connie, my girlfriend!” The people who really count in your life will know.
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